Between Your Body & Mine

Our “relationship” is over you say
I laugh
What relationship, I ask?

“Relationship” is a measured stare
The silence that falls
Between your body and mine

With the indifference of a surgeon
Slicing open quivering flesh,
You seek entrance
Your touch is a sharpened scalpel
Parting delicate seams

When the job is done,
You wash your hands and leave
My heart is bare,
An inconvenience between my breasts
I hold ripped flesh between my fingers
The bitter odor of blood is not forgotten

“Relationship” is the void you left
The times I sit alone, gazing out the window,
Again and again watching your car pull away
The times I am afraid, you point out my weakness
The times I am in need, you look away
And just when I get used to not having you around
You saunter through the door,
Holding a bouquet of excuses,
Faintly smelling like roses

Remember the incision,
Scalpel sliding down my belly
The release of blood and matter
Filling your hands
Silence fills the darkened hollow
Between your body and mine
You roll on your back, satisfied

I smile, at a different memory
My “relationship” has just begun…

I have been sitting alone at the coffee shop for weeks
A steaming mug to comfort me
When I meet someone new
We listen to lazy acoustics
Though I don’t hear a sound
My eyes have not left his face
When he gazes on me
The bitterness you left in my heart is sweetened

“What relationship?, I ask
There is nothing to say
About the nothing we share

Angrily, you declare
We weren’t meant to be together
I couldn’t agree more and tell you to leave
You saunter away, with a casual shrug
But leave the door slightly open
As if there will be another chance…
As if my face will be pressed to the window
Waiting for you to come back

No, I am behind you, tugging off my jeans
Sliding a denim skirt over my hips
Tugging off my tee shirt, lacy cami underneath
Slide on my sandals, and follow you out
You go out the back door
I go out the front

I watch as you leave
Just as always, looking forward,
Eyes avoid mine
Silence falls, just as always

In the empty space you left behind
His car pulls up
I slide in the seat,
Curl at his side
Where silence has been,
My heart beats fast….

Lynn Mari, © 2007.

This is a “Found Poem” based on a conversation I overheard while sipping cappucino in a cofee shop…

The Opening (Freewrite, Poetry)

Your legs are of steel and bone
Turned inside out
Every step is weighed
By the oddity of your feet
Whose twisted steps
Create uneven paths
Ambling across the pavement
With the dissonance of thunder.

I did not see you standing there,
Until the door was opened for me
In a simple gesture of kindness
I saw that it is the consequence
Of my unblemished legs
That makes me weak, malformed.

I took for granted that these legs
Would always carry me
Flesh smoothed over ivory steeples of bone
Muscle and tendon intimately knit,
The mechanics of strength
Of evenly walking.

My first steps were shaky
But soon grew steady
I ran with my eyes closed,
Imagining I could fly
I dipped my toes in cool pools of water
On hot summer days
I see now that these legs are unfinished
Burdened by thoughts, distractions
My every step is weighed
By life’s jagged pebbles
Creating uneven paths.

These legs can carry me much farther…

The collective moments that join a life
The gasp between a kiss
The sudden sting followed by tears
The dizzy feeling after laughter
Were all taken, in small steps.

Now we stand face to face
You give me a small smile
And open a door for me.

Lynn Mari, © 2009